Question: Hi, my question is that I feel like my husband always does the same "routine" in bed and it's so boring it actually makes me annoyed instead of excited.he tells me to tell him what I want but I don't even know. Just not that. Can you help me??
Answer: The way you phrased the question "my husband always does the same routine" makes me think that you are taking the back seat in your sex life. That appears to be the problem here. You are 50% of this relationship! You are equally to "blame" or to "thank" for the frequency, style, mood, intensity, passion, and pleasure involved. I imagine you have SOME idea of what you are tired of and what you may like. Would you be interested in changing positions? Would you be interested in wearing something different? Would you be interested in changing the lighting or the scent in the room? He doesn't seem to have a lot of experience, and men typically stick to what they know because they feel insecure about branching out. It is absolutely your responsibility to research ideas and then to consider whether you may be interested. Then it is absolutelyyour responsibility to talk to him about these new ideas or to initiate them yourself. Try looking at some of Dr. Laura Berman's books for some ideas, such as The Passion Prescription: Ten Weeks to Your Best Sex Ever or Real Sex for Real Women. These books will give you a starting place to begin to imagine what you may like to change.